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10 WORST HAIRSTYLES IN SPORTS

Mitchell Blatt

Sprewell takes home first prize; Who makes up 2-10?

1.) Latrell Sprewell- The only thing that’s worse than wearing those pigtails onto the court is being choked by a man who is wearing them. That’s why coach PJ Carlesimo never should have been in charge of the NBA’s Warriors. If he can’t handle that Warrior, how can he handle the Tru Warier? Which brings us to our next hair affair…

2.) Ron Artest- What’s written in Artest’s hair is truly a scary message. No, I’m not scared of Artest meeting me in a dark alley; I’m scared of what the world has come to when someone is willing to trash their hair like this while sober even if it is just to promote a ridiculous record label. The Tru Warier said in his rap album last season that he wanted to, “Get Ben Wallace in a choke hold, and cut his hair/ Yeah, the ladies is laughin’ as I smack with my left/While my right’s signin’ autographs.” Yeah, we all remember when you were too scared to fight Wallace and decided to go after a weak white fan instead.

3.) Rasheed Wallace- Now, if anyone could take out Big Ben, it’s his former teammate. Rasheed “Must Bleed” is famous for hard fouls reminiscent to his 2005 blood spilling elbowing of Cavs center Zydrunas Ilgauskas ), which drew a $5,000 fine and elicited seven stitches for Z. Needless to say, I’m a little scared of the consequences of putting his locks on this list. The bald spot in the middle of his head is just terrible. He has a full head of hair everywhere except that one big spot. Do something about it, ‘Sheed! He likes tattoos so much (judging by his arm), that I have to wonder why he hasn’t just got some hair drawn onto the bald spot.

4.) Randy Johnson- Muh-let! The best career move he ever made was signing with the Yankees. Better to pitch bad than win a Cy Young looking like that.

5.) Jeff Garcia- Garcia has always had a pretty unsightly shave, but what he did to himself with the Lions was horrendous. He let his hair grow out, but apparently it doesn’t grow on the front half of his head. What you end up with is a baldhead outlined by a layer of hair with a generous amount of frizz on top.

6.) Chad Johnson- He looks bad in blonde. He looks bad with a… damn, I don’t know what kind of haircut that is. Shouldn’t that be grounds for a fine?

7.) Randy Moss- First question: How did he fit his helmet on? I must give Moss props for spicing up the 2004 playoffs, but if he weren’t a pro athlete, than his locks wouldn’t get so much love. What started out as an unbelievable ‘fro turned into a flop.

8.) Steve Nash -Steve, why would you do this to yourself? Most people learned in 3rd grade that buzz cuts looked bad. From legendary long locks to this.

9.) Jason Giambi- “The beautiful people, the beautiful people…” Marilyn Manson must have not been signing about the Oakland Giambi in that song. In fact, with that hair, I could envision the Jay at the Bay standing up there on stage signing along with Manson. He looks more like a shock rocker than a baseball player.

10.) Jaromir Jagr -I use the term “athlete” here loosely because he plays hockey, but his mullet is bad enough that he still made the list.

Worst Hairstyles

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About the Author

mhblatt

mhblatt

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3 Responses to 󈫺 WORST HAIRSTYLES IN SPORTS”

  1. [...] listed the top 10 worst hairstyles in sports last year, but if I were starting from this year, Jones might make it. He looks like a [...]

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