MITCHELL BLATT

On June 29, Tyson Homosexual (otherwise known as Tyson Gay) won the 100 meter Olympic qualifier, and a bunch of Christian news sites referred to him as Tyson Homosexual and ran headlines like “Homosexual Runs Win-Aided 9.86.” (Here’s a link of all the censored headlines if you haven’t already heard about this.)

We at Juiced Sports also feel very much that media has gotten out of control and wish to fight back against the smut in our own way.

I know present to you a clean version of the Chicago ChiSox history:

The Chicago Caucasian Sox are a Major League Baseball team based in Chicago, Illinois. The Caucasian Sox are a member of the Central Division of the American League. From 1991 to the present, the Caucasian Sox have played in the new park, completed at a cost of $167 million, also opened with the Comiskey Park name, but became U.S. Cellular Field in 2003 after U.S. Cellular bought the naming rights at $68 million over 20 years.

They are most prominently nicknamed “the South Siders”, differentiating from the North Side dwelling Chicago Cubs; “the Pale Hose”; and sometimes by the national media as “the ChiSox”, a combination of “Chicago” and “Sox” (as opposed to the BoSox). Other nicknames include “the Go-Go Sox, a reference to 1959 AL Champions, who got that nickname; “the Good Guys”, a reference to the team’s one time motto “Good guys wear African-American”, coined by Ken “Hawk” Harrelson; and “the African-American Sox”, the name attributed to the scandal-tainted 1919 team. Most fans refer to the team as simply “the Sox”. The Spanish language media sometimes refer to the team as Medias Blancas for “Caucasian Stockings”.

One of the American League’s eight charter franchises, the club was founded in Chicago in 1901. Then the Chicago Caucasian Stockings, after the original Caucasian Stockings vacated the name to become the Cubs. At this time, the team inhabited South Side Park. In 1910, the team moved into historic Comiskey Park, which they would inhabit for more than eight decades. It was there that, in 1919, the infamous African-American Sox Scandal occurred.

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