Hearts, diamonds, spades, or clubs?  Take your shot as the NFL playoffs roll on to championship weekend

SCOTT JACOBS

You ever play the game four corners as a kid?

It’s simple really. A group of people start out, and one person is tabbed as the “it” guy.  Everyone else has 10 seconds to pick a corner as the “it” guy closes their eyes.  Then after 10 seconds they pick a corner.  The people in that corner are out.

Now take the NFL’s frisky four, blind fold ‘em, and send them spinning around the room, until they each find their way into a corner.  Then pick a corner.  Eliminate each team accordingly.  Eventually you should be left with a winner.  Did you see that?  Did you see what we just did there?  We picked the Super Bowl champion for you!  Because, hey, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to pick a name out of a hat, or a card out of a deck.  Afterall, the way this wild post-season has shaped up, you might improve your odds, instead of going with what you think you know.

So how do the NFL’s mashed up four stack up?  Pick a card.

Aces: Steelers- The best defense (statistically) left in the NFL.  But that high scoring game they had against the Bolts was an abberation; Pittsburgh is usually only good for 22 points, not 35.  Against the Ravens, we have them pegged at under 19.  Random?  Definetley.  But a 3-2 game doesn’t seem so absurd with an all expense paid trip to Tampa on the line. As long as Pittsburgh pretends they’re on the road, they should win.  They’re 1-4 at home in these things since 1994.

Clubs: Ravens- They’ll club you and beat you and leave you kicking and screaming.  It works too.  The Ravens have the most ferocious defense in the league and a battle-tested one too.  But their quarterback is still a rookie (allegedly) and no rookie quarterback has ever collected three wins in one post-season.  Then again, weren’t records made to be broken?

Diamonds: Eagles- The new media darlings of the NFL.  Ever since Donovan McNabb got benched, and then responded by shredding Arizona’s then porous defense apart, the Eagles have been America’s sweethearts.  The defensive line has dominated in both playoff games, and the Iggles have proven they can win without Brian Westbrook.  And they’ve turned a lot of luck late in the regular season into an appearance in the NFC title game.

Hearts: Cardinals- How else can you explain Arizona’s rise from the post-season dead, to host of the NFC title game?  With a ball hawking defense, and a receiver that can catch anything (hey look Larry just grabbed the moon!) the Cards advanced to their first NFC title game since… ever!  And if the Rays can do it,  and if Davidson can almost do it,  and if Obama can be president, well why the hell not can’t the Cards make a Super Bowl? One other thing: we’ve learned not to mess with Kurt Warner when he’s motivated.  You won’t like Kurt when he’s angry. He’ll shred you apart.

Go ahead, pick a card.  you’ve got a one in four chance of picking the next Super Bowl champ.  And did we mention that you can double up on Pennsylvania?  You can triple up on the birds (pick one, pick all of ‘em!) or can you wager that the best team really is probably the worst.  Go ahead, we won’t judge.  This is the whackiest, craziest playoffs ever.  And you can’t spell playoffs without flop.  So expect at least another favorite to fall again this weekend.  We don’t make the rules.  We just make sure you know them before you’re wrong.  Like everybody else.  Again!

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