SCOTT JACOBS

The good folks at Juiced Sports (always fun to talk in third person) have been bringing you opinions, content, and totally horrendous predictions (I am no Nostradamus people) for nearly four years (more on that in a few months) and so we have the good fortune of a pretty stacked library of past posts and content.

With Manny Ramirez abruptly ending his unique and colorful career it seemed like the perfect time to sort through the Juiced Vault (take that SI Vault!) to find some our favorite past stories on Manny.  Juiced Sports entered the sports blogosphere right around when Manny was beginning to grow stale of Beantown, giving us a colorful array of opinionated posts and reports to look back on.  With the cheating slugger now vanished from the game after a second failed P.E.D. test, here is our look back at Manny — the sorry sack of lying crap that he was, and how we’ve looked at him from afar these past 4 years.

What we’ve said:

Just blame the blogger, how convenient!

“The media is so quick to come to conclusions.  But when you’ve got idiots like Rafael Palmeiro wagging his finger at Congress, claiming to never have taken steroids, and then he fails a test, who can you believe?  When we were fully convinced that Manny Ramirez was just a once in a generation hitter who could make contact on any pitch, and then he fails a drug test, well, why should we believe in him?” – SJ

Why Manny Wants to Return to Cleveland…

“However, [Manny's] desire to return to Cleveland may not be rooted so much in wanting to return to where he started his career as it is in making sure he doesn’t get inducted into the Hall of Fame as a Red Sock, says one of my sources.” – MB
Editor’s Note: I don’t think Manny has to worry about what cap he’ll be wearing in the H.O.F. cause he ain’t going to be in the Hall after a second failed drug test

Manny Ramirez: you’re a joke (and a jerk)

“You know why athletes get a bad rap?  Because of jerks like you.” -SJ

“But you’re still hunting for every last dime, and it’s understandable that you need some money so that your children’s, children’s, children’s, children’s children never need to work a day in their life.  Back in 2000 the Red Sox really scammed you, didn’t they, by rewarding you with one of the biggest free agent contracts in baseball history?  They signed you to an eight year deal worth $160 million.  You felt cheated, so you took plays off, sometimes didn’t feel like running out that good ol’ ground ball, and you were constantly a distraction.  But “Manny being Manny” became funny, like a catchphrase.  It was cool to be a lazy over-paidout of touch with the real world jerk.” – SJ

It’s Not Gonna Happen (Maybe Next Year)

“Once again Manny Ramirez came through with another long home run. Man, has he been the perfect pickup for a Dodgers team now one win away from their first playoff series win in 20 years! You can say all you want to about C.C. Sabathia, but we might look back when it’s all said and done, and crown Manny as the greatest mid-season pickup of this year. The guy has been brilliant, and the Dodgers have been great since they landed him.” – SJ

I’m back from vacation and ready to rant

“Look, I loved ManRam as much as the next Sox fans for the 7 1/2 years he was with the team, but enough was finally enough. His cute antics and sweet swing had finally been outweiged by his manic personality and ability to give up on his team at a moment’s notice, and when he failed to hustle on a ground ball during a no hitter, well that was the last straw.” – JR

A Manny trade to the Marlins might not be what Florida needs

“Forget the fact that Manny is a head-case and he doesn’t run out ground balls or play even a solid outfield. Forget that you never know from one day to the next what Manny will bring to your team, that is, if he tries. Put aside the fact that Ramirez is getting older and finishing up an eight year deal he signed back in 2000 that made him one of the highest paid players in pro sports. Forget that all.  The Marlins should NOT trade for Ramirez.” – SJ

Manny Ramirez Needs To Be Traded

“If the Red Sox are a better team without Manny Ramirez, they should trade me; I will not object,” said the diva that refers to himself in the third person… Despite his enormous production, Ramirez, a man that assaulted a senior citizen earlier this month, has been problematic and troublesome for the Sox hierarchy and it may be time for team officials to stop providing the 12-time All-Star with the inane mulligan known as “Manny being Manny.” -CL

Hey Iraq: Manny is willing to play for your team

“I don’t have any preferences,” Ramizez said in regards to where he would like to be dealt if the Red Sox decide to make a move. “I could choose a team that offers me the best conditions or one in the chase for the postseason. I don’t care where I play, I can even play in Iraq if need be. My job is to play baseball.” … If the U.S. Marines went up to Manny and said they need an outfielder for their baseball team in between bombings to go to Iraq, Manny would just be like, “okay, My job is to play baseball?” Yeah, freaking right!” – SJ

Manny Ramirez Is A Thug

“Ramirez, a village idiot who is skilled at swinging a wooden bat and striking a leather ball, is often granted a pass with the nauseating phrase “It’s just Manny being Manny.” The native of Santo Domingo should not be provided such ridiculous leeway in this instance. Manny was just a thug and, if the Red Sox don’t reprimand their star, they are just as yellow as he is.” – CL

That folks, is Juiced Sports being Juiced Sports.

Photo: AP

SCOTT JACOBS

Throughout it all, the hitting streaks, the timely doubles, the infectious smile, and the dreads, Manny Ramirez was in every sense of the word, a memorable character.  As eccentric as they come.  So with his career clearly on the decline, his prestige nothing more than a name, “Manny,” and a team in the Rays clearly going nowhere it made sense that this year would probably be his swan song.

Call it a disturbing tune.

Manny Ramirez abruptly retired today, after reports began to leak that he tested positive for performance enhancing drugs in Spring Training, an automatic 100 game suspension for the slugger who was once larger than Fenway’s Green Monster.

Now he’s another sham: a bum who tried to hold on way too long, another black eye to the P.E.D. era that just won’t quite go away.

His numbers are Hall of Fame worthy, and his whacky unexplainable personality is the stuff of legends, to be told to generations of baseball fans to come. To leave in such a distasteful manner is rather fitting for the slugger, who didn’t do anything by the book.  Rather than let another suspension zap anything left of the credibility he had as a ballplayer, he buried his head between his legs and left the sport on a whim, an embarrassing escape from the sport for one of baseball’s all time feared swingers.

“I can’t put my finger on you. You’re unpredictable. Kind of mysterious,”  Allison says to Carl in the movie Yes Man.  The same could have been said of Manny.

No player was harder to explain.

Manny played in 2302 games, scored 1544 runs, recorded 2754 hits, 547 doubles, and smacked 555 home runs out of the yard.  He knocked in 1831 RBIs and walked 1329 times in an 18 year career unlike any other.

Yet none of it seems to matter anymore.

His numbers however gaudy are clearly marred by his now 2 positive drug tests (and however many before they started seriously testing for this stuff).  Another indictment to a sport littered with great players gone P.E.D. stale.  No sport has watched it’s heroes and titans fall faster than baseball.  First it was Rafael Palmeiro, then Mark McGwire, Sammy Sosa, Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, and now Manny.

I know we’re supposed to allow our players to be innocent before proven guilty, but this disturbing trends of stars fading right as they exit the game is a problem that greatly haunts the best players of today.  Once again all our stars are on a close watch, and how can anyone take what they do seriously?

In Harvey Frommer’s Remembering Fenway, a book of iconic Fenway Park pictures, the back cover features Manny stepping out of the giant Green Monster scoreboard, with a look that just sort of sums his career up.  That look?  Confusion, mystery, an aura of bizarre that exceeded anything beyond rationalization.

But that was Manny.  He developed into an elite power hitter in Cleveland, than got a fat payday from the Red Sox in 2000 ($160 million for 8 years) — a contract that brought incredible success to the Red Sox (including that long awaited World Series title in 2004 and 2007).  When things soured in Boston he became the savior in Los Angeles, reviving a dead in the water Dodgers team during an incredible summer of love tour in LA. Dodger Stadium quickly turned into MannyWood, and Ramirez was treated like a god once more.  But his numbers began to fade, and then the big blow — his first failed drug test for performance enhancing drugs cost him 50 games.

From there he became a sideshow, getting dealt from the Dodgers to the White Sox last season, and doing nothing to revive Chicago’s playoff hopes.

He garnered little interest in the free agency market this past offseason, until the Rays scooped him up in a desperate P.R. ploy to sabotage their poor fan base into thinking they still cared.

“I’m here, like I said, because I love the game, I love to compete,” said Ramirez at his press conference introducing him and Johnny Damon to the Rays. “It doesn’t matter how much money you make.  If you love the game, it doesn’t matter. What you want is a chance to prove to people that you still can do it. So for me, it was not about the money, I could have gone someplace else.”

Apparently he didn’t love the game enough to respect it and he certainly didn’t prove to people that he still could do it.

And in the end he did go somewhere else.  He hit the showers.  Permanently.

Photo: Getty

SCOTT JACOBS

Today Manny Ramirez was suspended 50 games by Major League Baseball for failing a drug test.  Shocking!

Did I suspect that Manny was using performance enhancers?  No, not really.  Did I think that a grown man would use a drug that women use during pregnancy?  Ha, another no.  But is it all that surprising that another big name baseball player bit the performance enhancing dust?  Not in the least.

You would think a guy that signed a two year $45 million deal would be a little more careful, but hey “Manny’s just being Manny.”  The Dodgers slugger claims he wasn’t taking steroids, but reports are already surfacing that he failed the test because of hCG, a women’s fertility drug, which is considered a close relative to steroids.

Two things have already come out of this story: 1) Wow, Manny is being suspended for 50 games, this policy really must be working.  and 2) It happened this year.  First, no player is immune from the steroids/PED’s discussion at this point.  Players great, mediocre, and crappy have all been  exposed, and any player who plays baseball should expect to be under suspicion.  Once upon a time it was innocent until proven guilty, but with the slew of steroid/PED users being exposed over the years, it has now become guilty until proven innocent.

People will disuss this issue and say that this means the drug testing policy baseball has in place is working.  But I wholeheartedly disagree!  You know when a system works?  When people are so afraid of the system that they don’t even dare test it.  Suspending Manny 50 games is merely a slap on the wrist.

You know what MLB should do, if they really wanted to get rid of this issue in their game?

Take away their money.  There should be a clause in every baseball player’s contract that if he fails a drug test, the team he plays on can void 1/10 of the contract he originally signed– no matter how far along in the contract he is.  In other words with Manny, not only would he be suspended 50 games under this policy, but he would be docked a remarkable $4.5 million!  Fail the drug test a second time, and you’re suspended a season, and 1/3 of your contract.  Fail the drug test a third time, and you’re suspended for life, and you’re contract is completely voided.

I guarantee you baseball players would respond differently.  I personally believe that MLB players don’t take the policy seriously enough still.  Cause in the realm of things, what’s 50 games?  In college if you plagerize a paper, even a few lines without giving that source credit, you get expelled from the school.  Your grade doesn’t get reduced a few letter grades, the university says “bye bye, see you later, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”  IF you cheat in a regular job and get caught, you get canned.  But in the green pastures of MLB if you get caught, you get slapped… on the wrist.

You always hear players say that they didn’t know that what they were taking was wrong, or they don’t think they were taking something illegal, but that in my estimation is because the system is too soft.  Watch how many players use that line if you docked them millions of dollars for their stupidity/arrogance.  Probably none.  You know why?  Because they’d be mortified of losing tons of money!

You make the policy so stern that players become scared to even test it.

Imagine a player who signed a seven year contract with a team worth say $100 million, and is in the last year of tht deal.  Imagine said player failing a drug test in his final year of the contract.  He’d lose $10 million!  And if the team didn’t owe him that much, they could simply demand that he pays them that.

Steroids in baseball would be gone faster then you could say HGH.  Because whether they love the game, or not, baseball players play baseball for the money.  They say they’d play for free, well I’d like to see them do that for a year.  If you really take a chunk out of their exploding bank accounts, maybe others would think twice.

Players know what they put into their bodies.  These guys are machines and their bodies are their temples, and anyone who thinks that players just sort of go with the flow when it comes to what goes in their body is a fool.  An athlete can be naive, but he’s aware of what goes in his body.  You don’t kill yourself for years just to get to the majors and then go, “ya just put in me whatever you like, I trust you.”  No, it doesn’t work like that.

Now the problem with this proposal is that the Players Union would never in a million years go for it.  But it’s fun to dream.  They say it’s tough to get rid of drugs in baseball?  I beg to differ.  If you really lay down the law, and hit these pampered athletes were it hurts most– their wallet– I think things would change swiftly and drastically.

Baseball can clean their sport of drugs, but they’re just not willing to go to the extreme to do it.  Because of that, more stories like this will continue to come out, and steroids and PED’s will continue to be an issue in the national pastime.

Photo: Reuters

SCOTT JACOBS

I think we’ve all come to grips with the outrageous contracts that our American athletes get paid for playing a game. I’m not saying whether we agree or in more likely cases, disagree with the ludicrous cash that is sent their way for being great, I’m simply pointing out that it’s become an accepted part of our culture.  However, that doesn’t just mean that in the worst economic reccession that many of us have seen in our lifetimes that our athletes can make a mockery of the sagging economy that we live in, just because they can hit a ball.

Hey Mr. Dreadlocks, ya you in blue shirt over there.  You know who you are, can I have a word with you.  A little birdie told me that you’re an ungreatful, evil jerk who not only gives up sometimes, but also way over-estimates what he’s worth.

I’d like to show you Joe over there who’s struggling to make ends meet because he was one of tens of thousands of people fired from Citi (even though they apparently still have the resources to sponsor the Mets new park).  I’d like you to meet that girl over there.  She’s been out of work for two years, because the job market is so competitive.  Sure, she goes to interview after interview, and sometimes she even gets close, but each time she agonizingly gets passed up because someone newer and younger steals her spot.  See that guy over there?  He was going to buy his family Christmas presents this past December, but after losing his job he’s now struggling to keep up with mortgage payments so they don’t foreclose his house.

I just wanted to ask you a question.  A few actually.  Let’s see, where to begin.  Okay, I got one.  Is it true you turned down a two year $45 million contract a few months ago?  That’s what the Dodgers are saying.  If that’s true, is it true that yesterday the Dodgers would have paid you $25 million just so you could hit a stupid white ball for them and play half ass defense, and you had the gall to say NO?

You know why athletes get a bad rap?  Because of jerks like you.  Idiots like yourself have no semblance of money, no presence of mind that the rest of the country is falling apart.  But sure, you really need the money.  I mean, who doesn’t need $25 million each season for like five years to make ends meet?

You make me sick.  Do you have any idea what it’s like for a teacher right now, who’s worked at an insitition for higher learning for 20 years and then gets laid off because the school can no longer afford her?  Do you have any idea what it’s like to be a caterer who’s worked for over 20 years, and is royally screwed because the last thing people are worrying about is parties and luxury.  People are trying to get by.  Some are reaching into their savings 30 years earlier then they had planned, because they have no where to go.

You know why athletes get a bad rap?  Because of jerks like you.

But you’re still hunting for every last dime, and it’s understandable that you need some money so that your children’s, children’s, children’s, children’s children never need to work a day in their life.  Back in 2000 the Red Sox really scammed you, didn’t they, by rewarding you with one of the biggest free agent contracts in baseball history?  They signed you to an eight year deal worth $160 million.  You felt cheated, so you took plays off, sometimes didn’t feel like running out that good ol’ ground ball, and you were constantly a distraction.  But “Manny being Manny” became funny, like a catchphrase.  It was cool to be a lazy over-paidout of touch with the real world jerk.

And now, after opting out of that deal, you’re back on the free agent market.  The Dodgers want you, but your agent is warning LA not to play “chicken.” No one else is even competing with them.  The Dodgers have no offense, and the fans have already embraced you.  No other city wants your poisonous attitude, and your unlikeable persona identifying them.

But no, it’s not good enough.  You want five or six years, instead of two.  You’re getting old, but hey, you play baseball, the sucker sport, where great players (good guys or not) can fleece franchises of hundreds of millions of dollars just for putting a little white ball in play.  So you’re sucking at the power teet, because hey it became clear a long time ago that you could care less what people think of you.

I’m so glad the Marlins didn’t trade for you.  While you would have most likely improved their record, and maybe even have gotten them to the playoffs, I’d rather fall short with good likeable guys, then do a little better with a clubhouse cancer, and someone who really needs to get a clue.

But hey, someone will pay you, someone always does.

That will never, however, change the fact that you’ve pissed off karma.  And karma is a bitch my friend.

SCOTT JACOBS

The Chicago Cubs coasted to 97 wins, put a great deal of separation between them and the rest of the NL Central, and convincingly rolled to the best record in the National League. Fans, experts, anyone with a voice began chanting, “This is the year. This is when the stars will allign, hell will freeze over, and the Cubs will finally win a championship.”

O Chicago, if it was only so easy.

Wait till next year? Sounds about right, after the Los Angeles Dodgers stunningly pushed the Cubbies to the brink of elimination, obliterating the North Siders in a pair at Wrigley to take a commanding 2-0 lead in this best of five series.

Maybe it’s really not shocking. Maybe we’re just naive buying into the notion that the law of physics says after a century of futility and frustration a team has to be due. These Cubs don’t look elite. And right now, they don’t look like they’re going to fulfill the destiny that their loyal faithful thought they would.

Instead, the last game (probably) played at Wrigley this year was a classic dud. A 10-3 spanking to LA, a team that has just come out of nowhere to not only win the NL West, but to look like a prime contender to win the National League. The baby bears looked liked they didn’t belong as they committed three (count ‘em) THREE errors in the second inning.

Not only did the Cubs drop two to the Dodgers, they dropped two at home, in the friendly (although the spattering of boos didn’t sound so friendly today) confines of Wrigley Field.

The Cubs made four errors on the night but the Dodgers earned this one. They scored on a bunt, they got it done on gapers, and once again Manny Ramirez came through with another long home run. Man, has he been the perfect pickup for a Dodgers team now one win away from their first playoff series win in 20 years! You can say all you want to about C.C. Sabathia, but we might look back when it’s all said and done, and crown Manny as the greatest mid-season pickup of this year. The guy has been brilliant, and the Dodgers have been great since they landed him.

As for the Cubs? Well, they’re once again displaying why regular season success means nothing. There’s a reason so many teams win the World Series as a wild card, or road team. Seeds mean virtually nothing in baseball. When you break it down the four teams are so closely matched for the most part that a Dodgers series victory wouldn’t be monumental.

Devastating to Cubbies fans, yes. But world-breaking, mind blowing, no, not really.

We saw this with Seattle in 2001 when they won 116 games and didn’t even make the World Series. So if the Cubs get knocked out, no one should be amazed. It’s a shame for Chicago if it happens. And it makes you wonder if it will ever happen, but outside of the Windy City it’s just baseball being baseball.

In a five game series anything can happen. Great pitching, timely hitting, good defense, and a relief staff that gets hot at just the right time is what it takes. The Dodgers have it.

I’m starting to believe.

Unfortunately, it’s no longer in the Cubs.

What’s up, JSB nation? I’m finally back from my family vacation to Cincy, and it looks like I missed some major sports news since I last posted.

While I was in the Queen City, riding The Beast at King’s Island and attending various family functions, I did manage to work in some sports. I went to the Reds/Rockies game the Sunday after I got there. Of course the crappy Reds got hammered, 11-0, but as it turns out it was Griffey’s last home game as a Red, so that was cool.

But other than catching a couple of nationally televised baseball games, that was the extent of my contact with the sporting world for the time I was there. So I thought I’d better do a little recap post to run down what I missed and give you my opinions on the major events that went down while I was up North.

Manny traded to the Dodgers
The circus sideshow known as Manny Being Manny is now exactly where it belongs-in Tinseltown. I was in a local sports bar down the street from my in-laws house when I heard the news, and I nearly choked on a wing bone when word came down that Ramirez had been dealt for Jason Bay, with Brandon Moss and Craig Hansen going to the Pirates in the three way deal.

For any of you who have been to Cincy, or eaten at Skyline Chili, you know that 3-ways are the best way to go. In this case the three way was not very tasty for Boston, but for some reason the Sox management couldn’t do a straight up, two team deal, so this was the only alternative.

My opinion: a deal had to be made, as Manny was quite clearly quitting on the team like he did at the end of the 2006 season. The fact that Boston had to give up so much to rid themselves of the headache he had become was an unfortunate byproduct of getting blindsided by his tired act. But at least they got a respectable left fielder (Bay) in return, a guy who will not a) quit on his team b) slap a teammate or shove an old man c) hide out in the Green Monster during games.

Look, I loved ManRam as much as the next Sox fans for the 7 1/2 years he was with the team, but enough was finally enough. His cute antics and sweet swing had finally been outweiged by his manic personality and ability to give up on his team at a moment’s notice, and when he failed to hustle on a ground ball during a no hitter, well that was the last straw.

As a result I say sayonara, ManRam. Good luck and no hard feelings, and I hope you enjoy life in La La Land. Because that’s exactly where you belong.

Favre finally dealt – to the Jets?!
This was the only sports story I could follow with any regularity while I was away, because it was freaking eveywhere! Every channel I tuned in on the radio during our 1,000 mile drive, every cable news channel, and especially on ESBFPN, it was all Brett, all the time.

By the time I got home, rumors were rampant that he was headed here to Tampa Bay to play for the QB-lover Jon Grunden and the Bucs. Thankfully that did not happen, as the Pack came to their senses and shipped the serial retirerer to the J-E-T-S so he can fail miserably in the city that doesn’t sleep. That way the whole world will be able to watch when he heads off into retirement #4 at the conclusion of the 2008 season.

(Maybe that’s his secret: he wants his retirement number to match his uniform number!)

The best part about this story: it’s finally over. Well, at least this chapter of it. Now we’ll have to sit through endless dissections of every game, play, TD and INT he throws while wearing that putrid green uni. Here’s to hoping he goes 13-37 with no TDs and 4INTs against the Pats in the second game of the season.

The Olympics and PGA Tournament get underway this weekend
WTF cares.

That about gets me up to speed on the major events that took place while I was gone. Now that I’m back I can get back to posting regularly, helping to balance out the inane ramblings of Colin and restoring some sanity to the blogosphere.

Thanks for your time and I’ll be back soon with a full post about my trip to Great American Ballpark.

SCOTT JACOBS

If you follow baseball, you’ve heard the rumor. The Marlins, Red Sox, and Pirates are talking a blockbuster three team swap that would net Florida Manny Ramirez.

I’m going to say something that might surprise a lot of people: I don’t think Florida should do it.

Forget the fact that Manny is a head-case and he doesn’t run out ground balls or play even a solid outfield. Forget that you never know from one day to the next what Manny will bring to your team, that is, if he tries. Put aside the fact that Ramirez is getting older and finishing up an eight year deal he signed back in 2000 that made him one of the highest paid players in pro sports. Forget that all.

The Marlins should NOT trade for Ramirez. Why you ask? I have my reasons, o I have my reasons.

Reason #1:When you have no expectations it’s a lot easier to play loose and relaxed (especially for a young team)
The Marlins know this better then anyone. Even though they play in South Florida the Marlins regularly finish in the bottom pits of the baseball attendance standings, and their payroll rarely dips above $60 million (this year it’s $21 million, lowest in baseball). The Marlins are the best bang for your buck team in the sport. With the $21 million they are loaded with young arms, and quality hitters. And they lead the league (all of baseball that is) in home runs. So just how are they doing it? Lack of pressure.

Tell me the last time the Marlins were on a national broadcast on ESPN. Can you do it? I can’t. You know why that is? It’s not because the Marlins always stink. In fact, in 2006 the Marlins were in the wild card race much of the year and that was with relocation looming over them. This year they’re the surprise of baseball. They have taken guys like Jorge Cantu and Alfredo Amezega, and have turned them into key contributors. The Marlins get their guys on the cheap, and they have a sensational eye for young talent.

And because the Marlins do things so shrewdly (you can call them cheap if you wish) they avoid the spot-light, because they never seem to have major egos or high paid players on their team (Hanley Ramirez’s deal doesn’t kick in until 2009).

Thus, they are unattractive to ESPN and other national media because they’re not fueled by any one guy.

They play loose and relaxed, because let’s face it: no one expects anything of them. All of a sudden you put a Manny on that team, and the media is all over you. All of a sudden the free-flowing, over-achieving, no pressure Marlins run into a media feeding frenzy. The Marlins are at their best when they do things their way: a few very good players, and a cast of quality guys around them. They have never been known as a dysfunctional group or a divided clubhouse. The guys like each other. They get along. That is a major team dynamic in this day and age. Adding Manny could completely change that.

Reason #2: They can’t resign him after the season is over. If the Marlins picked up Manny’s option for next year (no way in hell that would ever happen if they did acquire him), then he would be making just a million dollars less then Florida’s entire team this year. Even if he settled for a hometown discount (he does have a house in Fort Lauderdale) the Marlins would still be looking at probably $15-17 million a year, and they’re not going to pay that. If a guy like Outfielder Jeremy Hermida is part of the package to get Manny, all of a sudden you’re trading a young number two guy, who’s under contract at a bargain basement price, for a two month rental. Throw in the fact that you know what you’re getting with Hermida (decent batting average, above average power, quality fielding) and you have no idea what Ramirez will choose to bring, and it makes the trade a little dicey for Florida.

Reason #3: The Marlins may not need Manny. They’re in the thick of things in the NL East, just a game and a half back of the Phillies, and they’ve done it with horrendous defense, shaky starting pitching (though it’s been great of late) and a bullpen that is incredibly inconsistent. But here’s the thing. The Marlins have heart. And they’re on a mission: to prove all the doubters wrong. Starting Monday the Marlins take on the Phillies for three games in Philly, and may have a shot at first place by then. And they’ve done it with a superstar who bats less then .200 with RISP (Hanley) and a lot of young guys with a nice mix of veterans.

Florida gets back Anibal Sanchez tomorrow for the first time since 2006, and their starting pitching has dramatically improved of late. Ricky Nolasco has been great, Scott Olsen has been solid, Josh Johnson has been superb since coming back a few weeks ago, and even rookie Chris Volstad has performed admirably.

What the Marlins really need is a catcher that can hit. John Baker and Paul Hoover are probably the worst catching duo in baseball right now, and starter Matt Treanor (who is hurt right now) is far from a consistent threat. Thus, the Marlins should be looking at a quality, on the cheap catcher that can hit, and throw out some runners. Maybe even a lefty setup guy too.

But an outfielder for two months that can hit great, but is the biggest enigma in his sport: that’s not what they need.

SCOTT JACOBS

Manny Ramirez has said and done a lot of memorable things since inking an eight year $168 million free agent deal with Boston in 2000. But few will manage to top this gem of a quote that Manny had to say today:

“I don’t have any preferences,” Ramizez said in regards to where he would like to be dealt if the Red Sox decide to make a move. “I could choose a team that offers me the best conditions or one in the chase for the postseason. I don’t care where I play, I can even play in Iraq if need be. My job is to play baseball.”

Iraq? Really Manny?

Athletes say ridiculous things all the time, but this one, well, this is just insane.

If the U.S. Marines went up to Manny and said they need an outfielder for their baseball team in between bombings to go to Iraq, Manny would just be like, “okay, My job is to play baseball?”

Yeah, freaking right!

But its not the only moronic quote of the weekend.

Brett Favre is apparently totally naive.

“I had planned on reporting for the start of Packers training camp Sunday, but Ted Thompson asked if I would give him a couple of days to try to get the situation resolved,” said Favre about the circus he has created in Green Bay. “I agreed to do that. I don’t want to be a distraction to the Packers…”

Um, Brett, did you say, you don’t want to be a distraction to the Packers?

Because I’m pretty sure that’s what I read.

No, Brett, you haven’t been a distraction at all through this process. Green Bay is just playing a game, it’s called April Fools in July. They’re secretly testing how composed you can stay as they punk you into thinking that Aaron Rodgers is their starting quarterback. No distraction whatsoever.

ESPN sure doesn’t think so. Thanks to you they’ve had enough media programming to kill a cow. And I mean that in the nicest of ways- to the cow.

No Brett. No one thinks you’re a distraction. Not when you come in at the last minute demanding you want to play again and that the Packers need to release you. No, no scene there. See Brett, all these cameras that have been following you around are actually paid actors. They’re doing it for some SNL Skit. And Aaron Rodgers is the host!

You know Aaron, right Brett? The guy you left in charge. Or that’s the way everyone but you seems to see it.