NEIL DOUGH

Stan Van Gundy is still awake. He’s sitting in his hotel room breakfast nook, reading his morning paper, gently sipping on his mocha choka latte, and throwing down his Denny’s Grand Slam. He is also smiling from ear to ear. In his mind the Magic got away with one last night, and that is what he is going to tell his team. “We didn’t get beat, we beat ourselves.”

The Magic were not going to win game one last night. They could of doubled their terrible feild goal percentage from 30 to 60, and still would of lost. They could of fed Dwight Howard the ball on every possession, fouling out Bynam and Gasol at the same time, and it wouldn’t of mattered. Jameer Nelson could of sparked the Magic with 20 off the bench, but Stan Van Gundy is happy he didn’t. He’s smiling because now they have an excuse, a reason as to why they lost game one that he can actually build on. Deep down though he knows the truth. Kobe wasn’t losing game one. No matter what the Magic did.

There were moments in the 2nd and 3rd quarter where Kobe Bryant played like he was possessed. He looked hungry, mean, and determined. He wanted the ball on every possession, got the ball on almost every possession, and took it to the Magic every time. Aside from the moments where Kobe seemed to be on a planet all his own, the Lakers played unbelievable defense. The doubles on Howard, the perimeter defense on Hedo, and holding Rashard Lewis to only 8 points went a long way to sealing the game one victory. Poor shooting in the NBA is usually the result of great defense, and last night was no exception.

We will see how good of a coach Van Gundy really is in these next few days. He is definately going to blame the loss on poor defense and poor shooting, but will he make any adjustments? Will he tell his team to just play better d-, and hope the shots fall? Because on the other side of town sitting in the living room, still awake and burning insence there is a coach with heavy hands, and he is smiling too. He has Kobe Bryant.

Photo: Reuters

NEIL DOUGH

If there is ever a fight, or a tussle, even an argument in an NBA game, I still look for Jeff Van Gundy’s bald head to be sliding on the court holding onto Mourning’s leg. That is an image that’ll be stuck in my head for a long time, as will the quote from Stan the former “Master of Panic” Van Gundy about the BCS.

Has anyone ever summed up the stupidity of that situation so eloquently? These two brothers of basketball have me excited for a Lebron James-less finals, and I didn’t think that was possible. Jeff Van Gundy is the best color commentator sitting on an NBA sideline today.

If the Charlotte Bobcats were playing the Spurs (the most boring team of all time) for the title, I would still watch every minute if I knew Van Gundy was gonna be yelling into a mic. Watching the Nuggets get a Nancy Botwin style spanking from L.A., I can’t even tell you the number of times he had me cracking up. He has his own cult following, and certainly doesn’t need me kissing his you know what, but I have to get my opinions out there.

I do not want to hear boring statistics the whole game (Doug Collins). I don’t want to listen to whiny criticism (Bill Walton). If the game isn’t a nail-biter, then give me funny, funny, and more funny. Jeff Van Gundy alongside Mark Jackson provide non-stop ear action. Not to mention, when they aren’t being hilarious, the incredible insight that comes along with 30 plus years of combined NBA experience.

I can’t wait to watch and listen to Jeff calling the game while his brother is coaching.

Speaking of his brother…Stan Van Gundy, or as I like to call him “The quote-a-minute man”, has slowly but surely made a name for himself amongst the elite NBA coaches. I can’t remember seeing a better job of coaching than what I saw against the Cavs. He had his team ready to play (or come back) every night. He had the perfect game plan every night, and he actually talks to his team during time outs. (Mike Brown—you getting all this?).

How can you not root for this guy? After being called out by the Diesel, he coached his team back to beat the Celtics, and did the impossible by beating the Cleveland King James’. His antics on the sidelines during the game, and during the time outs are sometimes more entertaining than the game itself.

You can bet all the money you won by picking the Bruins to win the Stanley Cup (is that thing over yet?) that he will have his Magic ready to play against Kobe and the Lakers.

Game one is tomorrow night. I’m ready, the Van Gundi is ready (are ready? not sure), the question is…are you ready? I’m just kidding. I’m really not that corny. Thanks for reading.